Thursday, September 10, 2009

Writers Workshop- Marriage To Me: Amy the Romantic

If you want to see the prompts go here: Mama Kat Promts. Unfortunately I don't have a ton of time so I won't be listing them today but I encourage you to visit the prompts and then visit all the people who participate, here. So fun. I plan to. There were a couple of prompts that caught my eye this one in particular.

1. What does marriage mean to you? (inspired by Jon Gosselin)

I could talk about this forever so I will try to keep it short and simple but this has been on my mind recently.

If you lurk around our Mama Drama you have heard me (Amy) talk about The Hubs before. He is the love of my life. My one true love I call him. See because most of us have a first love, the one you THINK is the one, the one who sweeps you off your feet and then drops you like a sack of potatoes and leaves you a emotional wrecking ball. 99% of us ladies have been there, right? If you are the 1% who are fortunate to find your true love the first time around - Awesome. I didn't. My first love was an arse but was necessary in order to find my true love "God bless the broken road that led me straight to you. " - Rascall Flatts

See I believe that there is one person meant for each of us. It is written in the stars. I am a romantic - just ask Lady Di. I strive to have the marriage that both sets of grandparents had. However some of us don't take the time to wait around for that one and only someone. We jump too fast sometimes for good reason. ( I will get to that in a minute) See I think that marriage shouldn't be hard. It should be easy. If you are with the right person and it is a perfect fit then everything just works naturally. Of course things will be stressful at times but those times pass quickly and easily when you share the burden and work through it together.

Marriage to me is a a union, a contract of the heart. A lifelong friendship. It says that I will be with you always and forever, that I will do my best everyday to make you feel needed and loved. During tough times, I will provide a shoulder or be the rock that you need. I will never leave you feeling sad, betrayed, or unhappy because if I do I have failed and failure is not an option. I will always put our family first no matter what else happens in our life because when it all comes down to it family is all that matters. It is the reason we are on Earth, the reason Heavenly Father put us here.

Marriage is a beautiful thing if it is the perfect match. It is ugly and hard when it is not. When both people are struggling, pushing, and walking in different directions - it doesn't work. Marriage means having a common goal and working together to reach it. Otherwise it just doesn't work. How could it? It makes me sad when I see a marriage struggling or when one fails because I think to myself it so doesn't have to be like that. It shouldn't be like that.

Maybe I AM too much of a romantic. I recently had someone tell me that I was full of #!@*. Maybe I am. Maybe I got lucky. If that is the case, hooray for me. I'll take the lucky because I can honestly say that I wouldn't change a thing (well maybe the way The Hubs hangs the towels on the towel rack all bunched up so they can't dry or his horrible habit of cluttering my counter top.) Actually I wouldn't even do that because that is what makes him who he is and I know that I have some annoying habits that drive him crazy - but that's me and he loves me. If the good is perfect then the little things are just so trivial it doesn't matter.

Of course crap happens, right? I said I would come back to this. I came from a broken home, or was it? I recently had a conversation with my mama. It made me cry. She apologized for the crap. I told her not to apologize because the crap had to happen for the blessings to come. They came in the form of two awesome children and 5 beautiful grandchildren. For me they came in the form of an awesome husband and 3 beautiful princesses. Everything happens for a reason. WE are ALL meant to be here. My girls were meant to be here, the union of The Hubs and I was SUPPOSED to happen and so the crap had to happen - broken road. I told her that I was sorry she had to suffer through the bad for me and for my brother to exist but that I was grateful for all of it. I wouldn't change it and I know she wouldn't either. Was life always easy ?no! Is it easy now? not always. But as long as I have The hubs, my girls and my family I have everything I need.

Marriage to me is waking up everyday seeing my Hubs and smiling and thinking, my gosh I love this man more and more everyday and going to bed every night looking forward to the rest of my life with him. Looking forward to the adventures ahead of us.

Just one more thing then I will quit. I will never forget the moment that I saw my Papa look at my Grandmother with such love in his eyes that it brought me to my knees. Still does. See, he died a year ago next month. We were all there. I was there by his bedside when he said all he needed to say through his eyes. He looked at her and held her hand with such passion. They had been married for 62 years. **breathe Amy (and Monica if your reading this)** His eyes said, I love you more than anything in this world. I don't want to leave you here without me. I had never seen my Papa cry until this moment (he was not an emotional man). The moment I believe he knew he was leaving us and nothing else mattered to him but her. The love in that room was so powerful that I can't put it in words. This is what I strive for. What I believe I have found. How could I not want that for everyone?

On a lighter note. While I was typing this the MP cut her hair. A huge chunk. Nice huh?

Thanks Mama Kat, I needed this prompt today!



JennyMac said...

I.LOVE.This post.

The Cranford Family said...

You made me cry! A GOOD Cry!!

Lisa Anne said...

So sweet. Great post. I'm not married so I don't know what it means to me. I think it means exactly what you say in your vows. It's not just words, it's a legal binding a pact. Till Death do us Part. Probably why I'm not married.

shortmama said...

Dang it if that story about your grandparents didnt make me tear up! Beautiful!

ModernMom said...

Well thank goodness your baby cut a big chunk out of her hair because that is the only thing that sropped my tearing up from turning into an all out cry. Goodness what a beautiful post.
Go give that man of yours a hug, sounds like you two were meant for each other.

parentingBYdummies said...

Very nicely written. You are romantic. I'm not. Maybe that's why I had to choose a different prompt this week!

monica said...

This is spoken so right from your heart. You are so a romantic. What a wonderful post and thanks for makeing a cry! I was already teary eyed just thinking of how wonderful you and husband is made for each other, it is so true. But then you had to bring up the powerful marriage that our grandparents had - now I crying here at work! What a great writters promt and you did an excellent job at it!!

On the other hand, what part of her hair did she cut? I am sure it will grow back!

Amo said...

Great post! It is true, you are lucky! I have a great husband, too, although we do fight. I'm stubborn, he's stubborn, we both are hot-heads in sheep's clothing.

If you think you have celiac, you should definitely get tested! I just had the blood test done (none of that colon probing for me). I pretty much knew I did b/c of the types of foods that sent me crying to the bathroom - pizza, pasta, pretzels, some breads, beer...if it contained a lot of gluten, I got sick. Anyway, it is worth it to get tested. And, the gluten could be doing permanent damage to your intestines.

Enjoyed your post! Sorry for the gluten rant. I can't help it! I don't want other people to be in agony for years like I was!

Unknown Mami said...

Lovely. In the end I think marriage is what you make of it and you're making it beautiful.

Just A Mom (Call me JAM for short) said...

WOW! Beautiful story about your grandparents! We all strive for that kind of love...

blueviolet said...

I'm so happy that you have such a beautiful love and marriage.

The Redhead Riter said...

OMG Everything was great until I got to the next to last line! A chunk! LOL

Happy SITS Thursday

Muthering Heights said...

You're getting me all choked up!!

Lady Di said...

Never apologize for being a romantic! You and the hubs share a great love and you have every right to revel in it. Now go whisper sweet nothings into each others ears before I write something sarcastic.

And how 'bout that MP?? At least she cut her own hair and not one of her sissys.

Erin said...

A lifelong friendship....I LOVE that!

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