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Monday, July 20, 2009

Pokerface,Hillbilly Laundry, and Radar Ears- Monday's Mama Drama

You know you have Mama Drama when....

1. you are playing a friendly game of poker at a neighbors house, your 3 yr. old girl is sitting on Daddy's lap when he gets his cards and she says, "Oh! 7 and 4." Thanks poker face, Daddy was folding that hand anyway, but your "lap time" just got cut short.

2. you have to use the HOSE. OUTSIDE. ala Hillbilly... to get the mud that is caked not only onto but inside (I don't even want to know how that happens) not one, but three pairs of your son's pants before they can even be put in the washer.

3. you find yourself (yet again, remember last weeks B.S. statement?) making up more "Mommy Lingo". Let me explain (clears throat): I was on the phone with my hubby and made the comment, "No, they are Effed Upped." My son "Radar Ears" hears me and says, "What's Effed Upped mean?" I say, "Uh....Fantastically Unoperational, you know a fancy way of saying something is broken. In fact it is too fancy for a little boy like you to say, only mommies can say it." Son: "But my chisel (one of his tractor toys) is unoperational right now." Me: "Yes, but is it Fantastically unoperational???" Son: has thoughtful, contemplative look. Me: "See, it's too fancy."

4. your son then spends the rest of the day trying to find something in the house that is worthy of being deemed Fantastically unoperational.

And Finally...

5. a tree falls on you while inside your parked vehicle and somehow that got translated in the 3 yr. old's mind that YOU did something wrong and now she has anxiety every time she gets in the car with you and has become the world's youngest back seat driver. All I hear now is "watch out for the car mom", "mom, you are driving too fast", "that was a close one", and the best one was after we got to our final destination after an hour drive she said, " Phew, we made it!" Thanks kid.
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11 comments:

blueviolet said...

Your 3 year old is a riot now. I can't wait to hear what she's got cookin' for the teenage years.

The Redhead Riter said...

The backseat driving comment cracked me up. It is going to be a long childhood...

:o) Wishing you a happy Monday!

monica said...

Oh the back seat driving is a classic one that happens to me on a daily basis even without a tree falling on me. Unvaling the cards was too cute!

Kristin said...

I hope I can think on my feet like you when the time comes!

ModernMom said...

Lovin the Mommy Lingo. Amazing that little kids never miss a private conversation but you have to ask them three time to wash their hands before they "hear" you.

Amy said...

Fantastically upoperational! LOL!

My Mama Drama - the MP got into Grammy's jewelry and lost an emerald earring! LOVELY!

Oh and the pup woke up at 5am ready to go outside and play. This would have been no problem except I had one of my issues last night and didn't fall asleep until 2:30.

Lisa Anne said...

The poker comment was so funny. Only my 9 years doesn't fit on my lap, he just walks around the table saying oh is a queen ace good, etc after looking at everyone's cards. He's officially been banned from the table whenever we play cards. lol

shortmama said...

Classic! Fantastically unoperational...love it!!

Trudy said...

I love how quickly you can think on your feet...it's awesome! I would just like to be a fly on the wall someday when he is in school and picks up a toy saying, "man, this is effed up"!

John Deere Mom said...

Crack me up! And muddy/caked on dirt jeans? I am so with ya!

Lydia Dustin said...

love you!

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